Timing and Intention

​On October 11th, I officiated Alex and Ryan’s wedding ceremony at The Mansion (TFWC) in Austin, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:

Ryan and Alex first met in 2018 on the Jew-ishly named Coffee Meets Bagel, back when both were students at Texas A&M. The first round didn’t quite take. Alex admits, “We went on a few dates, some of which I truthfully did not remember until we reconnected and Ryan had to fill in the blanks for me.” 

One date she does remember, though, was at Napa Flats. Ryan spent the evening talking about a passion project — a custom beer pong table he was building AND coding. Alex says, “I remember being so impressed with his skills and his knowledge… He was so passionate about it, I was really in awe.”

But timing is everything. Alex wasn’t in the right place for a relationship then, so she broke it off. Not before “borrowing” Ryan’s graphing calculator — which he still insists was theft, and which remains Exhibit A in his case against her.

Two years later, in Dallas, the timing WAS right. This time it was the vaguely Yiddish sounding Hinge, and this time everything clicked. Ryan describes it simply: “Whether we’re actively doing something or just spending time in the same room, I’m always happy. We might be building Legos, gaming, watching a movie, or simply doing our own thing, like her reading while I play video games, and it always feels like time well spent.”

Alex says, “Ryan makes me want to be the best person I can be, in every way. He is the best communicator; he is always willing to have an open and honest conversation with me. He is the smartest person I know; I learn new things from him every single day.”

Ryan admits he had some hesitation at first — not because of Alex, but because she was his first serious relationship and he wanted to make such a big decision with intention. But over time, he realized: “Being with her makes life better. Not just more fun, but more grounded and fuller. I’ve known for a long time that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.”

And when it came time to propose, Ryan went all in. Nine months of quasi military planning, changing his daily wardrobe for months so dressing up fancy wouldn’t tip her off, a custom ring, family and friends secretly flown to Disney World, and a ride photo on Tiana’s Bayou Adventure with signs behind them reading “Will you marry me?” It wasn’t just a proposal — it was a story, perfectly tuned to Alex’s love of The Princess and the Frog, and her favorite princess, Tiana, who shows that you can work hard, achieve your dreams, AND find love.

And really, that’s what we learn from Ryan and Alex. Love is about timing, yes, but also about intention. It’s about the joy of nerdy passions, from Star Wars to cats named Azula. And most of all, it’s about finding the person who makes life not just more fun, but more grounded, fuller, and, as Alex puts it, the person you “cannot picture a better life with.”